SeptagonBank

Our plans

Green

EUR 18.99 / mo

Our most expensive product is titled Green so that we can guilt trip you into paying us more.

Currently unavailable

Popular

EUR 9.99 / mo

Honestly it has no extra benefits but maybe you buy it because it's popular.

Currently unavailable

Minimal

EUR 4.99 / mo

We basically give you nothing, but aye it's cheap right?

Currently unavailable

Basic

Free

You want ads? Because this is how you get ads. And nothing else. Enjoy!

Currently unavailable

What we offer

7/24 customer service

Actually we replaced it with an AI service which is surprisingly incapable but we don't talk about that.

Secure transfers

We are subject to a data breach now and then but we haven't had one for a while!

Sustainability

Our marketing team said our website performs better when we have these buzzwords lying around.

Reviews

"I was sent here through the app to leave a positive review. Although I haven't received my dollar just yet. Weird."

~ Gerald Bobsmith

"I didn't really use the app but it looks nice."

~ Berke Filiz

"Really chill guys. I called them a couple of times to order pizza on accident and they were always kind when rejecting my request. I don't understand what kind of company in 2023 doesn't offer delivery though."

~ Bob Geraldson